This picture was taken in the month after my attachment figure left. The month of her departure, when I did eat, all I ate were chips.
For quite sometime after I took this picture, I would look at it with regret. I wished I placed the whole “heart chip” on top and the empty one on the bottom. I wanted it to be in that order because I wanted it to represent what I felt my a.f. did to my heart, how she came and broke it.
I forgot about this picture until just now as I was looking through my pictures and came across it. I remembered my initial regret and smiled because the picture was perfect.
My a.f. caused me a great deal of pain. Pain I fear ever experiencing again. However, that hole in the center of my heart was there before she came into the picture. My heart has been learning to heal, not with the help of human hands, but with the hand of God. The order of the picture is perfect. My heart has been broken, now God will fill it. I believe that even when I don’t feel His presence, I know that sometimes the only reason I am up is because God gave me the strength. He sticks his firm, yet gentle fist right in the center of my crumbling heart and lifts me up.
Only He can complete the center of my chip, the center of my heart.